I feel possessed by a force that I can’t quite describe nor comprehend as it has gripped me to the core. My voice is subject to this force for I cannot express myself like I usually do inspite of appearing normal externally. I only hope that it is not a demon as sometimes the case is but rather I hope it is a being or spirit from the gracious side.
I have seen worse in other people that have walked the same path before and it scares me to think that this may be the path I end up treading in the months to come if no remedy is applied to the status quo. I offer a prayer to my FATHER who understands better of my predicament but the answers are not forthcoming as I continue to exhibit malfunction in my daily life with minimal improvement.
Every morning I wake up wishing it was the night before when I had just gotten into my bed. Sleep is my only solace from this trouble. I have been here before and I have been victorious before in a similar challenge that has been brought before me. It is usually a test when a man is ready for the next level of association with his MAKER as he knows HIM.
Can’t say it is glamorous much less easy, yet it is considered to be a privilege. I have no control of my destiny neither do I have any hold of my endeavors as I plan my days ahead. I am finally at the mercy of the force that now possesses me with no sign of letting go in the near future.
Should I fight it or surrender fully to this force I ask the question ? Should I fight back to empty my soul of this possession which may leave me in a worse state than before ? The former feels worth giving a try though I don’t know how to go about it for my flesh aches for what it is familiar with. Maybe I should seek advice from elders that may have experience in these matters even though many now look to me for direction younger as I am.
I see things. I perceive things. I have a gift that nobody understands how it came to be even though they have watched me for some time now without comprehension. Could be my MASTER seeks to use me to speak to the nations about this state of mind that I have come to possess as a result of being possessed.
Some may want me gone for good for I disturb the gnome of understanding held for generations handed down by their long gone ancestors. The MASTER does as HE so wills when it comes to HIS chosen one and any opposition will prove futile no matter how resistant it may be. I can only yield to HIS will and follow HIS ways as HE wills my direction as to where HE would wish to go for HIS sake and not mine.
It is awkward to be possessed but clearly it is an honor to be bequeathed by the true MASTER.