I feel the pain like it was inflicted in me at this very moment even though the impasse occurred years ago. I bleed with no end in sight and no recourse at hand. Many have tried to help me to no avail as I continue to sink lower into somewhat of an abyss. My MAKER seems to remain silent in the matter as HE has not shown me any end to the pain that continues to inspire my writings of what yearns in my mind.
Animals would crawl into hiding to prepare for demise but I choose to remain in the open in front of all to see and ponder. I see the look in the eyes of my comrades and friends as I continue to weep for help in broad daylight knowing that one more infliction will be the end of me.
My MASTER did this deliberately to capture my attention as to the direction that must change in my life. Even though I see no warrant for this, I choose to humble myself as the incision proceeds. Hyenas are not far away and the prey is looking sweeter than ever before. Why don’t you deal me a final blow Lord or do you relish seeing me in pain, I contemplate.
My instincts tell me that all will be well in the end as day after day goes by. It becomes bearable with the possibility of it eventually becoming comfortable. Doesn’t make sense to my carnal mind but endures in tandem with the faith that I have come to grow over the recent years.
I take off the bandage and any covering placed on the opening otherwise the wound will never heal. Why must I torture myself like this, if not for the fact that I would like to see what comes out on the other side of anguish. I know that all will be well and all will be swell as the pain begins to numb and the wound slowly turns into a scar.
I have reached a point whereby I don’t remember the cause of the nightmare in the first place and it warms my heart that I no longer need to go through it again to understand the basis of this lesson.
Though I am wounded, something tells me that it all happened for a divine God-given purpose.